Let’s be honest with one another for a moment.

Do you have a plan for building your children’s character?

I’m serious… do you?!

Personally, I consider myself fortunate when my children go to bed well fed, bathed and without having thrown >5 tantrums in a day.  Now being intentional in building character in my children?  That’s only for the really amazing parents, right?!

Not so much!

Thankfully with resources like what Family Matters provides to today’s family, we can be intentional in teaching our children about character, even when they are young.

Below you’ll see the six character traits that Dr. Kimmel outlines in his book, Raising Kids Who Turn Out Right. For each of the character traits, I’ve chosen one practical action point that you can do to start building character in your toddler’s hearts.

Six Character Building Tips {for Toddlers}

1. Faith

Let them see you reading your Bible each morning.  As Stacy mentioned in her post Word to the Weary Mom, there will come a day when you are back in a position to devote hours to Bible study.  But, for now, use short devotions instead of long Bible studies.  You will be amazed at how God will meet you where you are right now.

“The life of faith isn’t a done deal just because our kids prayed a prayer one day.  It’s a walk. A journey. And our job of modeling it is never over.  As we live it out each day, we find that we, too, benefit.” (pg 62, Raising Kids Who Turn Out Right)

2. Integrity

Apologize when you wrong your children.  Do you ever discipline your toddler out of anger?  Apologize.  Yes – even to your toddler.  As they say, more is caught than taught.  We want our children growing up to be women and men who are quick to admit fault.

“All other skills and talents, regardless of how carefully defined, must submit to the demands of integrity.” (pg 67, Raising Kids Who Turn Out Right)

3. Poise

Have your children verbally thank the people who regularly help them (teacher, friend, Sunday school teacher, pastor, etc).  

“Poise is gentle strength.  Parents leave a legacy of love to their children when they transfer skills that make the most of moments and relationships.”  (pg 87, Raising Kids Who Turn Out Right)

4. Discipline

Assign daily chores and hold them responsible to perform them. Some examples of chores that are appropriate for toddlers might be to help make their bed, pick up their toys and books or help to feed pets.

“Discipline helps children live up to their potential, their gifts, and their capabilities.  It gives them a sense of confidence as they move into the future.  Dreams more frequently come true for children who see that discipline consistently pays off.” (pg 102, Raising Kids Who Turn Out Right).

5. Endurance

Show your child(ren) how to save money by putting money they receive into a piggy bank/savings account.  Have them save a certain sum of money that you agree to match once they meet their goal.

“If we want to pass on eternal character traits along the way, we’re going to hit walls every day.  That’s why endurance must be a part of our personal makeup as well as one of the character traits we want to hand off to our children.” (pg 117, Raising Kids Who Turn Out Right)

6. Courage

Visit a fire department and ask one of the fire fighters to tell your child(ren) what it means to be courageous.  

“Each day presents us with opportunities to teach our children about courage.  We may develop great outlines and stirring lectures on faith, integrity, poise, discipline and endurance, but if our kids don’t see us courageously living out these character traits, they won’t be inclined to pursue them.” (pg 138, Raising Kids Who Turn Out Right)

Meal preparation once was and can still be a nemesis for me: selecting the right balance of nutrition, preparing the meal and expecting my two daughters now 4 and 5 years old will value my efforts and the nourishment to their bodies.

My first born rejected eating at three weeks old. Doctors diagnosed her with a failure to thrive with no significant reason why. The specialists inserted a feeding tube through her nose. I fed her formula on a regimented schedule until she was 17 months old.

In the hope that she would switch from formula to solid foods, I diligently applied a regiment of integrating solid foods just as one might do with any other child. I sought the help of feeding specialists. My daughter would have nothing to do with drinking liquids except water. Without liquids, she failed to intake enough calories from solid food to grow well.

There was always a struggle to entice her to swallow. The primary setback came from her lack of hunger. She also battled the influence of the annoying plastic tube running down the back of her throat. I was taught by experts, mealtime had to be fun and social.

Esther Daly is a great eater today. She happily consumes a balanced meal from a large variety of foods. Having a backyard garden has contributed to her success greatly.

As the mommy I supply and encourage the consumption of life sustaining balanced nutrition. I also become the primary giver of her spiritual food as well. The same passionate, fun-filled efforts I put toward her caloric intake I also channel in to her spiritual formation.

Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’” – Matthew 4:4

What does a balanced meal of spiritual food look like? As I think on the meals I prepare I also think on implementing a regiment similar to this:

• Whole grains: I liken whole grains to walking humbly with God (Micah 6:8). When we live humbly with God as the central focus of everyday life, He is our daily portion of peace, perspective, and provision (Psalm 73:26). He is our sustainer (Psalm 54:4). When we eat processed grains like pride or self-reliance, the empty calories allow us to function but fall short in feeding us the valuable vitamins and nutrients we need for deep peace and joy.
• Fruits: I liken fruits to loving mercy (Micah 6:8). The taste of love is juicy and sweet full of powerful nutrients to fight against intruding evil (Luke 6:27-36). Our love we give freely to others interrupts impending ugliness offering compassion and forgiveness. Love fortifies our hearts against bitterness toward injustice (Ephesians 6:12).
• Vegetables: I liken vegetables to acting justly (Micah 6:8). Vegetables feed us the vibrant truth of God’s goodness. Being obedient to His Word, the Bible, renders us blameless and pure without fault (Philippians 2:15).
• Beans, nuts, and meat: I liken proteins to acting with Godly wisdom (1 Corinthians 2:13). Feast on the protein imparted by the Spirit of God. In all circumstances seek the Lord in every way (Ephesians 6:18) for His spiritual truths. Do not rely on your human wisdom to speak of spiritual matters.
• Milk products: I liken milk products to courage to believe and trust God (Joshua 1:9). Faith pleases God (Hebrews 11:6). Our courage to trust God comes when we feed on HIS rich, creamy goodness. Our culture tells us that whole milk, cheese, and butter are bad for us. The world encourages us to feed on manmade imitations – IDOLS.
• Oils: Similar to hope (Hebrews 3:6). All we do should magnify Christ and Him crucified. We accomplish this by closely holding on to the hope of our salvation and the promise of everlasting life. Oils anoint us to carry out the work to build up the body of Christ to maturity attaining to the whole measure the fullness of Christ (Ephesians 4:12-13).

Jesus, our Shepherd, challenged the Apostle Peter three times.

The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.” – John 21:17

If we forgo feeding proper spiritual nutrition to our children and opt instead to feed them with artificial, processed food, we starve our babies of the nourishment they need to grow in character and love for our Creator.

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates. – Deuteronomy 6:5-9

Join us this month as we give you little snippets of insight from Dr. Kimmel’s book Connecting Church and Home, which is ready for purchase!

Order your copy today!

Download a FREE Sample Chapter!

And no, that was not a good thing….

Kristina, our second born was healthy, smart, helpful, and compliant. She was often there to help our son Joey (3 years older than her) when he needed his shoes tied, face washed, or teeth brushed. The problem was – she was somewhere around the 5-7 year age range.

Joey’s special needs made it such that he needed a lot of help for us just to “get out the door” and often, she was very willing to help. But one particular day, I had asked her to do a number of things, right in a row, and not with much chance to comprehend it all. That was when she said, “Mom, I feel like CINDERELLA. Not the pretty one, but the one who had to do all the work.” Ouch.

That comment was the “reality mirror” for me. I became keenly aware of the fact that she needed to be a kid. I never expected her to “take over” my job of caring for Joey, but I was happy for her help, and at that moment I could see I was asking too much.

I immediately made some changes – perhaps they will be helpful for you with your children, and also with your extended family, friends, and others in your life:

• Don’t bark orders and expect others to jump.
• Each child needs attention – one on one as often as you can. Invest in each child.
• Allow your children to “understand” that you must take time (and often more time) with the child with special needs, but find things they like to do and purpose to do it with them.
• Have family meetings. Talk about the “work load” and if they feel you are expecting too much of them. You might not like what you’ll hear, but the open communication serves well for now and when they become adults.
• Don’t beat yourself up when your children are honest with you. Let them share.
• Show appreciation in words and actions for those who lend you a hand.
• Don’t make others feel stuck helping you. Ask first.
• Don’t expect others to know what you need. If others offer to help, tell them what is helpful.
• YOU make caring for your loved one look easy because you do it all the time. Others will need to be trained to help you. Take the time.
• When asking other children in the family to babysit/care for/look after the one with special needs, treat them like you would someone coming in to help. Ask them to set the day aside for you and confirm it with them – like you would with a babysitter. Pay them like you would a babysitter. Ask them how things went and if there is a way that would make life easier for them when they are helping you.
• If someone offers to help, ask them what they most enjoy doing. Make and keep a list so you can call on them. The longer your list, the less often you’ll have to call on and rely upon one or two people.
• Be sure to do things your typically developing children want to do – even if it means finding someone to stay home with the one with special needs.
• Have fun. Life is better that way.
• Make sure you get your daughter a pretty prom dress when her time comes – so she knows how the pretty CINDERELLA felt!

Whoever said, “Love means never having to say you’re sorry,” was an idiot. I’m not even sure what that saying means, exactly. Does it mean that if you truly love someone, you will never wrong them and therefore never have to say you are sorry? Or, does it mean that because you are in love that the wrongs done to each other will be forgiven and forgotten without the need for an apology? Either way, it’s flawed, illogical thinking.

It took about 13 hours minutes into my marriage to realize that we were going to have to learn to apologize to each other. A couple’s ability to sincerely apologize, forgive and move past hurt is directly correlated to the success of their marriage. Of course, it’s nice when we can also use those opportunities to grow and become less flawed, but let’s face it, we usually don’t. Typically we do the same annoying or inconsiderate things over and over again, so the mechanism of apology and forgiveness is very important to a relationship.

Just when I thought I had this all figured out, my husband and I had kids. The first few years of parenting revolve around meeting your baby’s physical needs. Deciding how you will feed, diaper and teach your child to sleep, as well as all of the cognitive and emotional development that happens in the first few years is vital.  But, once our children start to become walking, talking little individuals we find that parenting starts to extend past decisions about meeting physical needs to answering emotional, spiritual and disciplinary needs as well. It’s at this point in parenting where sincere apology becomes a crucial skill.

I have found that when I have wronged my children, either through words, actions or a decision I regret, a swift and sincere apology seems to mitigate much of the pain, resentment and hurt that could come as a result. It’s so simple, and yet it can be so hard to get down on your knee and say, “Honey, I’m so sorry that I snapped at you. I was frustrated, but I shouldn’t have taken that out on you. I love you. Will you forgive Mommy?”

Apologizing and seeking forgiveness defuses anger, hurt, resentment and retaliation. It acknowledges to our children that we know we aren’t perfect. It shows them a living example that making mistakes is inevitable, but it’s what we do after those mistakes that defines our character. Our kids will grow up practicing both forgiveness and repentance because they see it modeled in us.

“Above all else, love each other deeply. For love covers a multitude of sins (mistakes.)”  1 Peter 4:8

Before marriage and family, I worked as a certified snowboard instructor for 10 years. I recognize it’s easier to train a beginner to execute beneficial skills than it is to retrain someone who has unproductive ones. I’m making an effort to apply this philosophy to sharing in my household.

When bickering over a toy between my two preschool age children echoes down the hallway, I restrain my impulse to shout, “Get over yourself; it’s all God’s anyway!”

Living out the principles of Biblical sharing is complex, especially when the natural inclination in all of us is toward selfishness*. Every two year old declares a toy, “mine.” For me to ask my preschool age children to master sharing would be like directing them to ski a double black diamond mogul run.

Sharing is a matter of the heart.

In my mind I ponder, “How do I impart a willingness to share in their hearts?”

I condition my children to share by offering consequence if they don’t. I reassure them the toy will return to their care in a set amount of time. I guard the prized toy. And yes, I’ve come to learn, crafty techniques like this work, somewhat. But I haven’t addressed the real issue – the heart.

You know the adage, you can lead a horse to water but, you can’t make them drink. Well, I can lead my three year old to perform sharing behaviors but only God can change her heart.

Stimulating a young mind to have a sincere heart to want to share begins with me sharing. I speak about and regularly demonstrate the benefits of my eternal inheritance in the Kingdom of God as a disciple of Jesus. I offer them the opportunity to share in its benefits too.

I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. – Ezekiel 36:26

The playgrounds of life often reinforce the natural inclination to focus on self – posturing for power, perusing for celebrity and bestowing wealth. To yield unselfishly to another is to show weakness. There really is no durable inspiration to share other than Christ at work in our heart.

When we share Christ’s love with our children, He will begin to renovate their heart to produce willingness. As they begin to follow Jesus as the 12 disciples did, they will initiate these 5 principles of Biblical sharing in their lives:

S – SERVANTHOOD – Your children will value being a servant to all.

Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, “If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all.” – Mark 9:35

H – HUMILITY – In humility, they will consider others better than themselves.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. – Philippians 2:3

A – ADORATION – Over time they will grow and mature to adore others; love gives.

For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. – 2 Peter 1:5-7

R – REMEMBRANCE – They will remember Jesus’ great love for them, frequently. As they experience His outpouring of mercy and grace, they too will offer mercy and grace. They will choose to act like He does giving generously of their time, talents, and treasures.

Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. – Luke 6:36

E – ENLIGHTENED – They will embody the hope of eternal life giving freely of themselves and their treasures to those in need.

I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, — Ephesians 1:18

* Genesis 8:21 The LORD smelled the pleasing aroma and said in his heart: “Never again will I curse the ground because of man, even though every inclination of his heart is evil from childhood. And never again will I destroy all living creatures, as I have done.

Upon taking her first breath, my little Nora was ALL energy.  Even at the age of 3 months, I can remember laying Nora under her playmat where she would spend the next 5-10 minutes moving every single part of her body 100 miles an hour, as if she was training to run an Olympic marathon (or a 100 meter sprint rather).

{Help for the visual learner – feel free to check out this video that a friend of mine took when Nora was 4 months old. }

Of course Nora (oh sweet Nora) hasn’t slowed down one bit over the past three years.  Not. One. Bit. Not only is her physical strength and endurance like none I’ve ever seen before, but her emotional energy is the same.  ”Nora is the Super Ball in a room full of rubber balls.  Other kids bounce three feet off the ground.  Every bounce for Nora hits the ceiling.”  Italics mine. (Mary Sheedy Kurcinka, Raising Your Spirited Child)

Oftentimes I find myself wondering if I drank too much coffee when Nora was in utero.  Or could her energy/spunk/emotional rollercoster-ness be something that I’VE created… or worse yet, a curse?! I’m constantly questioning what I’m doing wrong in my mothering of my little spark plug.

Can anyone else relate?!

Although I’m tempted to allow my thoughts the opportunity to spiral downhill into a sea of discouragement when it comes to parenting Nora, God so often reminds me of Dr. Kimmel’s words in Grace Based Parenting…

“To talk about grace, sing about grace, and have our children memorize verses about grace – but not give them specific gifts of grace – is to undermine God’s work of grace in their hearts.  Grace not only means that God loves them even through they are sinners, but that He loves them uniquely and specially.” (p. 141)

God loves Nora (and your spirited child) JUST. THE. WAY. THEY. ARE.

Our kids don’t have to all look like or even act like every other kid.

Ahhhh.  Isn’t that freeing?! 

When my focus is on Nora’s outer appearance and actions, I’m in for a world of disappointment.  But when I chose to focus on her inner self (what God cares about the most), I am more easily able to embrace who God created her to be.

Now I’m not claiming to be an expert in raising Spirited Children, but I will say that I’ve learned a lot over the past three years. Below you’ll find a few things that have helped (and continue to help) me to embrace Nora’s uniqueness as a true blessing from God ::

1. CELEBRATE.

Celebrate the person that GOD has created in your little one!  He knew exactly what He was doing when He created Nora and when He created your little one. And to Him – it all works together perfectly – for His glory.

Praise God!

2. DON’T COMPARE

Comparison is a killjoy. It will steal every ounce of contentment in your heart and leave you feeling empty.  Every time.  You can count on it.

Surround yourself with friends who will speak truth into your life when you start to play the comparison game and who will treasure your child for who they are.  These friends for me have helped me tremendously when I start to fall into the mental trap of focusing on my “have-nots.”

3. YOU’RE NOT ALONE

When you’re in the thick of it, it’s tempting to feel like you’re the only one raising a spirited child.  Well – you’re not!  According to research, 10 to 15 percent of all children living in this country fit the description of a spirited child.  That means there are lots of parents who understand what you’re going through.  Your child is not an oddity.  You are not the world’s worst parent.  You are not alone.

Let’s all take a sigh of relief together after that one.  “Ahh……”

4. NORMAL BUT DIFFERENT

Each child is unique to God.   But let’s be honest with ourselves, some are more “normal” than others.  And in Nora’s case it’s been important for me to embrace the idea that she’s normal but different.  And different is good.

Giving her the freedom to be different, as Dr. Kimmel discusses in Grace Based Parenting, is one of the key objectives we have in our home.  Nora doesn’t have to be like any other kid that we know, because she isn’t anyone else.  She’s Nora, normal but different.  And EXACTLY who God created her to be.

Do you have a spirited child?  If so, what are some tips that you can share with me (and our readers) about raising your spirited child?  I’d love to hear from you.  Comment below.

Do you ever secretly (or not so secretly) long for a different stage of life? Maybe you want to go back to being DINKS (dual income, no kids). Or perhaps you’d like to return to the days of one child instead of four. Or just possibly you’d like to experience life without:

• Diapers
• Two year olds
• Carpooling
• Teenage angst and
• Never ending laundry.

Or maybe instead of doing without the above, you’d like to try life with:

• A full night sleep
• Your own package of Oreos
• A sweet little 1 year old who doesn’t talk back yet
• Clean floors and
• Time for yourself

Now that our nest is empty, I actually have all of those things on these lists. (Hey! I feel those jealous glares. Don’t give up. It’s on the way for you too.) But now that I have what my heart used to long for, I’m often nostalgic for those past times. The sweet memories of the way things used to be put a big smile on my face.

I know it’s hard for you mommies of preschoolers to understand why I might want to revisit some of those yesteryears as you stare at the garage door, willing it to rise and deliver your reinforcement. Or you moms of tweens and teens may have a “are you crazy” comment as you run out the door, throw the Taxi light on the top of the SUV and race to the next activity.

Call me super crazy but I even miss the chauffeuring, the backpacks lying around, the shoes scattered under foot and the unmade beds (maybe just a little). Of course, just when I’m knee deep in sentiment, I trip over Tim’s junk and am reminded that the kids may have flown the coop but the rooster is still strutting around leaving his stuff in his wake.

I’m relearning the lesson that I learned at every stage of motherhood – be content with where you are. I’ve discovered that I have to be just as deliberate to choose contentment in this stage of life as I did in the other seasons of my life. Contentment is not having what you want, but wanting what you have.

And it starts with gratitude – being thankful in all things. In fact, gratitude is the seed of contentment. When you can be thankful for whatever age and stage you’re in, then you begin to enjoy the things that fill up your life and you actually grow to appreciate them and, viola, you become content.

What are some of the simple things you can be thankful for at this stage of your life? Sticky floors? (You’ve got a roof over your head); Loud music coming from the family room? (Your teenagers’ senses are working fine); A hardworking husband who’s late for dinner? (At least he has a job). You get my point.

Way too often we are so anxious to get through a stage and get beyond a season, somehow under the delusion that the next one will be better than the one we’re in, that we fail to reap the benefits and enjoy the treasures of the time we’re in. Tim loves to remind parents that when it comes to raising our kids – the days are long but the years are short.

Contentment teaches us that life is never perfect but God is always good. Why not make a choice to be grateful for your life as it is right now and usher in the covering of contentment.

Here’s to wanting what you have in order to have what you want,

Love,

Darcy

I call it the “preschool dilemma” and it’s causing a lot of angst in many moms’ minds. Where to send them? When to send them? How to pay for it?

When I tell these moms that I didn’t send my kids to preschool, mouths drop and eyebrows raise like I’m some sort of back hills, intellectually challenged dinosaur.

Preschool has become almost a given today but I kind of feel like its one of those expectations that has become bigger than life and women are doing it because everyone else is doing it. Remember what your parents said about that logic! I’d like to challenge you mothers of preschoolers to step back and reassess this whole preschool pressure.

When my children were young, I felt I was actually qualified to teach them the basic intellectual information required to enter kindergarten (Numbers, Letters, Words, Colors, Scissors, Glue, Crayons, etc.) After all, I had graduated from high school and gone to college. I also felt like I had the socialization thing under control (siblings, neighborhood friends, Sunday school, Awana, Bible Study childcare, play groups, etc.).

I was also a stay at home mom at the time who made a choice to forgo some of the financial perks that a second income would have provided, including preschool. In fact, the choice to manage our household on my husband’s ministry salary encouraged me to be creative when it came to getting my kids ready to start school. What’s that saying? Necessity is the “mother” of invention.

Invention #1

Our local high school had a childhood development class and for 12 weeks each semester, they offered a little two day a week, hour and a half “preschool” for the neighborhood preschoolers. Two of our children enrolled in this program, loved it and had their first graduation (cap and gown and all) from their future high school alma mater. This alternative offered a chance for Shiloh and Cody to experience a classroom setting, learn to follow directions in a group context and begin to define who they were apart from me. It was just enough and it was FREE.

Invention#2

When our youngest was four, a group of us moms, who all had four year olds, decided to put together a preschool co-op that was (you guessed it) FREE. Most of these moms were staying home with their kids, some of them were very well qualified teachers and all of us wanted to prepare our kids to start kindergarten the next year.

Eight moms formed four teams of two and each team was responsible for conducting two months of preschool for these kiddos. I can’t even remember how many times a week we met (maybe twice) and for how long. But the other 6 moms would drop their kids off for the morning at the home of one of the teachers, while that teaching team of two provided an educationally enriched time for the 8 children.

Thankfully, I was teamed with a highly qualified elementary school teacher and my responsibilities were more along the lines of crowd control, recess, planned recreation and snack time. For those kids who were pretty mature for their age as far as attention span and small motor skills go, they were affirmed and challenged to progress even more.

For those kids, like Colt, who had a hard time sitting still long enough to get a book opened, let alone read it to them and who still could care less about cutting and coloring, there was enough freedom, group activities and affirmation to make sure they went to kindergarten thinking school was a lot of fun and they could succeed.

This is the year that all of those four year olds graduate from college and to the student, each of them has had a stellar academic career. I’d like to think some of that can be attributed to Invention #2, our free preschool co-op.

The preschool dilemma doesn’t have to cause such anxiety for moms. There are all sorts of ways to get your child ready for school. These are just a few that worked for us. What are some of the ways that have or are working for you?    

Please tell me I’m not alone in feeling some (if not all) of the following statements throughout the course of a normal {mommy} day?

“I’m just not doing enough.”

“If only I could be like __________.”

“What if __________?”

“(Insert your child’s name) isn’t like (insert a friend’s child’s name)! Is it because of something I’ve done?”

“I really should do__________, __________ and __________.”

As these questions go round and round in my head, I start feeling discouraged and eventually come down with a serious case of Mommy Guilt.  Can you relate?!

Even with great resources like Stacy’s The Mommy Truth blog post and a good grasp of God’s amazing grace, I still continue to find myself feeling guilty about what I’m doing (or not doing) as a mom.

Thankfully, I have a handful of very Godly girlfriends who are willing to speak truth into my life when I most need it.  These days the truth that has given me the most freedom in this adventure called motherhood is simply the permission to let go of my guilt and cut myself some slack.

Don’t we all just need to be given permission (by anyone really) to relax a little bit?

So although I’m new in this motherhood journey I thought I’d do my part and give YOU, my mommy comrade, permission to do any (if not all) of the following things…

• Take a Nap
• Let your kids watch TV
• Go on a Date (yes – that means you have permission to get a sitter)
• Breastfeed or not.  Does it really matter in the end?!
• Take an Adults-Only Vacation (with your hubby or girlfriends)
• Leave dusting for another day
• Don’t do any of your Pinterest pins.  Really…there’s no reason to feel guilty how you’re not like Susie Homemaker, who makes her own yogurt and then pins it on Pinterest.
• Order in Take-Out
• Get a pedicure
• Say “No” to that school/church volunteer need
• Let your kids jump on the bed
• Buy that pricey pair of heels you’ve had your eyes on (and wear them…on previously mentioned date)
• Read a fiction book
• Leave the dirty dishes till the morning
• Eat ice cream for dinner
• Stay in your PJ’s till noon sometimes
• Go with your gut instinct about what your child needs versus listening to every “expert”
• Not sign your child up for every activity
• Not make your child complete that ridiculous homework assignment
• Not attend your bible study friend’s daughter’s birthday on Sunday afternoon
• Not donate a dollar to the children’s hospital every time you check out at the supermarket
• Pay full price for that box of diapers for the sake of convenience
• Buy bread at the CircleK
• Fall asleep in front of the TV
• Watch CSI

Now go my friend and throw away the guilt that so easily engulfs us as moms.  God promises us life – and life in abundance! Your children are going to “rise up and call you blessed” because of the way you loved them, laughed with them and played with them, not whether you had a perfectly clean house and baked your own bread. Their childhood goes by too fast to let guilt cripple you and steal your joy!

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.” – Hebrews 12:1